How K-pop took over my life

Korean pop music has made its way around the global and I have always liked a few k-pop songs throughout my life, but it wasn't until I became a part of an online community did I realize just how time consuming and mentally draining it can be.

With constant comebacks, albums, merch and everything in between like social posts and the fishing done to please fandoms, it can grow to be too much overtime especially for one person.

Dark and Light Content Sides of K-pop Fandoms

Couple that with both the light and dark sides of the fandom and before you knew it, I became a recovering k-pop fan trying to find my away out of it.

While I won't get into all of the details, I will give a summary. I became a part of this online community that was centered around k-pop but was natively j-pop. I spent 2 years in the bubble surrounding them. Going to lives around the clock, buying merch and flying to places to see them perform new songs and be as supportive as possible.

I even broke the little taboo, never fall in love with your idol - that's for another blog post though so I digress.

I recognized myself through the first year, but the second year I didn't. I had become almost crafted by k-pop. It's a lifestyle. Making edits, making dance covers, screaming and being feral over the artists, wanting them to feel wanted so they can have the energy to keep going.

I never realized just how much I changed until I decided to step away to find my center, just to realize that my prior center no longer existed.

I found myself looking for k-pop in everything, seeing the members of the groups in everyone, it was like waking up in an unfamiliar environment and I couldn't explain it to anyone. And I find/found it way too easily.

Which if you're on the light side of k-pop, the surface that's fantastic and great but if you've stumbled into the darkness of down bad k-pop, you'll realize quickly that you'll now be in recovery.

While I don't want to actually bring you the darkness, it is a very... unsettling place to find yourself if you are all love and light and bubblegum kisses.

The community

Most communities are normally split into two, with one being the kindest, most giving people you've ever met and the other half are gatekeepers - you never truly know who you are going to run into. Every person is a Russian roulette. You could even find a unicorn, like myself, who would only gatekeep certain things but not all things.

These sides are not equal nor does the kind side always reign depending on the fandom. You'll find some people who see the artist as growing human beings who have yet to reach their full potential and others who will see them no more as collectables.

While I have been scarred away from wanting to be a part of a community, I still support from a distance to allow myself the freedom of autonomy. I do encourage others to try and find a friend or two in these communities, because some of the most wonderful people I have ever met came from them.

Overview

K-pop can be a very fun and interesting experience if you allow yourself to be free within and don't allow it to control your life by becoming obsessed with it. While you can find a new identity or something new about yourself there, it's a very fine line so be careful.

Keep breathing life,

Sheridan